David Shrigley at NGV
Have you checked out the cult English artist’s display at NGV yet? The Life and Life Drawing exhibition showcases sculpture, painting, animation, books and a healthy dose of Shrigley’s borderline offensive humour. It’s a tragicomic daydream and it’s closing on March 1.

Non-romantic films
If Fifty Shades isn’t your thing, there are some alternative films playing with fewer whips and more superheroes. There’s a double feature of Batman and Birdman at The Astor Theatre. Or catch the feel-good, French classic, Amelie at The Val – the newest summer screen and intimate hangout housed at Richmond’s Swan Street Chamber of Commerce.

Photobook Festival Fair and Pop-Up
This weekend during the Photobook Festival, the Centre for Contemporary Photography in Fitzroy will host a book fair selling local and internationally produced photography books as well as self-published handmade zines. Get along to show your support or just pop in for an All Day Donut or Jasper coffee.

Get a drink at Bar Exuberante
Let things get a little strange and wonderful and go down the rabbit hole that is Bar Exuberante. It’s a high-concept bar – part Grand Budapest Hotel, part 1960s cruise-ship bar. It certainly makes for a different place to drink on Valentine’s Day – so take someone open minded.

Get cheesy (the good kind)
Cheese, chocolate and wine. It’s a holy trinity any day of the year. The underground Cheese Cellar at Spring Street Grocer is hosting a decadent event of fromage-inspired dessert creations on Saturday from 5pm to 6.30pm. Call 9654 6657 or email to book. Alternatively, hit up Milk the Cow or Shifty Chevre to get equally cheesed.

A day at Heide Museum
Get some wind in your (helmet) hair. Spend the day riding from Abbotsford Convent to Heide Museum. Fuel up on breakfast and coffee at any one of the Convent eateries or graze at the morning market. It’s a cruisy 13-kilometre ride, and once you arrive, sprawling gardens and charming galleries await (as do rock-hard calves). If you haven’t checked it out already, the iconic exhibition Brides by Australian artist Arthur Boyd is still on display.

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Long walks and caffeine
Saturday’s forecast is a humid 30 degrees. So, (assuming it doesn’t rain) why not take to the walking trails of Melbourne? We’ve even mapped out the coffee pit stops for you.

Short walks and ice cream
The other option – walk less, eat more ice cream. We’ve seen some incredible new gelato spots open up in the past year (Pidapipo, Miinot, Il Melograno, to name a few) – now is the time to try one out.

What Rhymes with Cars and Girls at Arts Centre Melbourne
It’s the opening weekend of What Rhymes with Cars and Girls – a small musical production by local playwright Aidan Fennessy. It weaves songs from Tim Rogers’ first solo album (of the same name) into a tale of urban romance and love across the class divides in modern-day Australia.

A musical Valentine at Sidney Myer Music Bowl
Get along to a free evening of star-crossed love and ancient tales of desire presented by Melbourne Symphony Orchestra. Performances include Romeo and Juliet by Tchaikovsky, Daphnis and Chloé by Ravel, orchestral lieder Strauss and a musical love story Porgy and Bess by Gershwin. Gates open at 4pm, first come first served.

Make a ramen mess
Cult city ramen shop Hakata Gensuke has just opened a second restaurant in Hawthorn. So you should be able to get your fill of noodles with less of a wait. You’ll know its love if you can splash ramen down your front and they stick around.

The Flying Dutchman at Palais Theatre
The Victorian Opera has transformed the original Richard Wagner masterpiece into an epic stage production, The Dutchman; a haunting love story about a doomed ghost ship, all set in front of a dynamic, 3D projection. Tickets range from $30–$110.